Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Bidi Bidi Bom Bom


Tonight is the first night back in my apartment after the Legally Blonde tour has come to an end.... and have I been able to just sit back and relax and enjoy knowing that I don't have to work tomorrow at any point of the day????? Nope... not at all. Welcome to me! I have just spent the past 3 hours cleaning out my home office.... I have been going through boxes that have been packed up for over two years now.... and THROWING SHIT OUT! But also finding little treasures of good times past.... I have also found a few things that remind me that... well... I AM A NUT JOB.

Some things I have found so far:

Over 2 THOUSAND CD's.

A Shoebox of Baseball Cards... (I don't know one player)

6 Random, grammatically incorrect T-shirts from Japan (Photographed and trashed!)

3... I REPEAT...3 Selena Dolls! IN THE BOX! WHO THE FUCK AM I????? I grew up a little white Jewish kid .... why do I have these???? (Gonna try and sell these beotches.)

An unopened 1997 16-month SELENA Calendar! REALLY? 1997? REALLY? Selena? Why? I'm embarassed!

A CD of a recording of me singing BIDI BIDI BOM BOM... (consider it DESTROYED!!!! No one will EVER have to be put through hearing this!)

And an entire CD holder of Porn. (I'm keeping that)



I find it interesting how I can live out of two suitcases for 2 years... not needing ANY of that shit that is in that closet.... but have trouble making the decision to throw certain things out. Why do I need a receipt from a grocery store in Japan??? I DONT! Get RID OF IT!

I have developed my own way of overcoming any Hoarding tendencies I may harbor... however small they may be.. It's this new invention called... a camera! I now take a picture of the shit I don't need, but are great memories.... then it takes up less space...and I can look at them on my computer and have the same feeling as if I was touching it. I mean.. I KNOW I'm never going to wear most of the clothes that I save...they are just to look at and remember.. SO why take up space in my small Queens, NY apartment? WHY I ASK YOU... WHY!!!!?????? I don't! Problem Solved... This doesn't mean for anyone to stop buying me gifts... I LOVE GIFTS! But if it is a gift that I am never going to wear or use... I'm warning you now... I'll probably take a picture of it and give it to some Homeless Person... so don't come by looking for it if you are super sensitive. I say this 'cause I care!

I would think the one big question that would come from this entry would be... Why the obsession with Selena? I'm not even Mexican. and I DON'T Eh-Speakuh Eh-Spanish! . Plus... I learned about her after she was killed.... (on March 31st 1995 by the president of her fan club... Yolanda Saldivar...that WHORE.... who is still in jail... and will not discuss her involvement in the shooting.... I still mourn.) Yeah.... I've got a screw loose or something... or maybe just HAD a screw loose. Either way... It's not like I went to any of her concerts... or met her... The answer?... I have no idea. But I know that I went FULL OUT with my support. (3 DOLLS! I'm yelling now... THREE... DOLLS! I'm a grown Man... and I have have kept 3 Fucking Selena Dolls... the dolls themselves aren't fucking...HOW DARE YOU?!!!!!!)

So... um.... basically... what I'm trying to say it... Does anyone want to buy 3 Selena Dolls? Still in the original, slightly distressed boxes!

Tuesday I start getting my life together. Let's see how that shit goes!

Love and... Dead Mexican Singers!

Ven


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is seriously my favorite new blog. I'm not even kidding. Keep the posts coming. It's fun to read stories from someone who is just letting it all out.

AJR said...

EBay that shit.